Undercover operation

Somehow, sex without moans, squeals, and even the occasional howl doesn’t seem complete. But sometimes, you have to hit mute because of small family homes, thin walls, even nosey neighbours! Or if you’re indulging in notto-be-talked-about action by stealing yourself into your girlfriend’s home... But sneaky can be fun. Here’s how to stay under the radar when you’re under the covers:

Seal cracks.

Weatherstrip the inside of the door frame and put a threshold seal (find one at any hardware store) right along the bottom of the door. If you can see light through the cracks, sound will go through, too. Else push some carpeting up against the door.



Play barry white.

Strong bass sounds disguise lowfrequency noises—like the headboard thumping against the wall, says Bennett Brooks, president of Brooks Acoustic Corporation. Mattress squeaking? You’re better off with music that also squeaks. Think Britney.

Buy a scrap piece of carpet and place it up against your door. heavy carpets and wall hangings are good for absorbing noise. the more fuzzy stuff you have in your room, the quieter it’ll be.

Go under cover.
Down pillows and blankets are heavier than most other materials, so they usually muffle sound more effectively.

Turn on the shower.
The kids (if any) will hear water running through the pipes of the house, and won’t hear you.